A Dream of the Giants

In a dream, we are all merely guinea pigs in some giants’ experiments. The giants take a sharp knife and cut into us, and a portion of our kidney or liver is removed, blood splattering as we suffer and faint in agony. Like Prometheus whose innards are pecked by vultures, our bodies slowly heal from the wounds and the damaged organs spontaneously grow back, only to meet the giants’ next harvest. The next harvest, the one after that, and after that… Endlessly repeating.

If the giants were to cut not just a portion of our organs but instead extract our entire kidney, laying it flat on the ground, that organ, devoid of its host, would still pulsate with vitality. It would move actively, taking a step or two in random directions, just like a malfunctioning compass when the plane flies over the north magnetic pole. Amidst its erratic movements, the lonely kidney exhausts its precious life force, perhaps in a search for a new host, but its efforts are destined to fail. Before long, the pulsations cease, gradually settling into eternal stillness, like a ping pong ball tossed onto the ground. Blood seeps from the kidney’s interior, leaving a deep red puddle on the ground, marking the chaotic trajectory of its futile dance. That crimson stain is destined to dry up and firmly stick to the ground, impervious to the cleaner’s efforts to scrape it away. It is the last vestige of our remaining resilience.

Humans cannot escape this fate; we are merely guinea pigs of the giants. Many have attempted to flee, but it is impossible as our dwelling is surrounded by an unfathomable expanse of water, with no one able to swim across. We do not even know if there is another shore or if there harbours even more ferocious giants. Once, people formed human chains, each grasping the legs of the person in front of them firmly with their hands, submerging into the water. No one knew why they did it, perhaps out of a desperate hope that the chain would eventually grow long enough to become a flesh-and-blood bridge leading to the other side. However, everyone knew they would ultimately drown slowly and painfully in the water, their bodies stiffening, their eyes lifeless, skin darkening and decaying until only skeletons remained—just like coral. Will there be later generations, following this human chain to find a way out? No, there will never be, because the giants will eventually discover the chain. At that moment, a giant will angrily stride into the water—an unfathomable expanse for humans but merely waist-deep for the giants. Massive splashes soar, and the giant, with a pair of rusty shears, pulls the human chain out of water and severs it into pieces. The shears effortlessly cut through flesh, muscles, and bones in arms and legs. In no time, the water surface becomes littered with the shattered remains of limbs, some hands still gripping tightly onto legs even after being severed. Blood oozes into the water, and as the giant impatiently roams, enormous waves of red mixed with flesh spray all around…

I, too, am part of this human chain, and the giant is about to reach me. I feel immense regret—not for joining the chain, but for not having committed suicide in a comfortable, painless way when I had the chance. Why did I choose to live, only to witness such gruesome scenes? Why is it human instinct to cling to life, no matter how wretched it may be? Why is the instinct of a quarter-cut kidney to regrow, regardless of the endless agony that awaits? People always shortsightedly see the seemingly beautiful things in front of them: three meals a day to fill their stomachs, occasional intimacy with a loved one, the end-of-month salary credited, Christmas celebrations with family and friends… All these short-lived moments of happiness occupy our minds, creating an illusion of contentment and deceiving us to continue living. Not only must we live on, but we also have to reproduce new lives, passing on our perceived joy and genuine suffering to the next generation, the generation after that, and after that… However, what we do not know is that we are merely guinea pigs of the giants, and one day they will seize us all and throw us into this prison surrounded by water. Here, we lose all our partners, possessions, and pleasures; we lose our freedom to act and speak; we lose love and compassion; and we lose everything we once considered important. Yet, all those losses are inconsequential. In fact, the only precious thing we lose is the right to suicide. Deprived of that right, we are forced to continue suffering in this hell, having our kidneys extracted, and being severed by the rusty shears until we are utterly shattered.

(Originally written on 12 June 2023 in Chinese; English translation based on ChatGPT results.)